Carla Cantor Knows Your Name

Carla Cantor

Carla Cantor is a streetlamp in the dark. She is warm and illuminating, signaling: come over, there’s a space for you here.

“There is nothing not social about me,” she says, laughing. It is not an exaggeration. Over decades, Carla has transformed friendliness into community. For her, belonging is not accidental. It is built deliberately, through conversation and invitation.

When her sons were young, Carla remembers feeling deeply uncertain about whether she belonged among the women at synagogue. She was deeply concerned about fitting in. Finally, she gave herself a challenge: volunteer for everything, show up for everything, and if after a year she still felt unwelcome, she could walk away. “As soon as I made an effort,” she says, “I learned everyone was super nice.” The experience became a kind of philosophy. “I don’t assume people won’t like me. I learned to be friendly, first.”

After retiring from thirty years of teaching, she famously hosted her own retirement party. Staff members at the JCC were baffled, but Carla saw it differently: “I see a party as a gift to all the people I invite.” Soon after, her husband, Mark, spotted a JCC job posting in Community Programming. The fit was immediate. “I walked in and knew I had found my people.”

A member of the JCC for more than twenty-five years, Carla has woven herself into nearly every corner of community life, including serving on the Board of Jewish Family Service, volunteering as Kitchen Maven for Kol Ami, the National Council of Jewish Women, Family Promise, and beyond. She chairs the Shalom on the Range committee for our JCC, keeps Mahjongg alive, and can be found in Pilates, swimming, or group fitness classes most days of the week. “I always treated exercise as a job,” she says. “Now it’s a social engagement, too. It’s fun!”

Beneath all that motion lies Carla’s quintessential social quality: an instinct to notice when someone is having a hard time and refuse to let them carry it alone. Carla recalls meeting a woman at the JCC who was navigating profound grief after losing her husband of fifty years. Like her decision to show up for everything at synagogue, she went all-in on being a supportive shoulder. In time, the woman joined Carla for Mahjongg, finding companionship, laughter, and a renewed sense of place.

Jewish tradition teaches the importance of welcoming the stranger. Carla has mastered the mechanism of making people feel that they belong. She will pull up an extra chair, remember an anniversary, make the follow-up call, and host the gathering. In a world increasingly disconnected, Carla casts a warm light, making it easier for people to find their way to one another.